Moe Ari Brown, LMFT
(they/he)
Hinge's Love and Connection Expert
This question has more to do with your relationship than your family. It gets to the heart of whether or not you both are ready for that next step.
In short, it's important to be on the same page about what introducing a partner to family looks like and means.
We don’t all come from the same background. And, like what happened to Kristen Stewart in Happiest Season, blindsiding your partner is never a good idea. Shared expectations allow less room for surprise, shock, and pain later on. Five questions I recommend talking through:
- Where are you in the process of coming out to your family?
- How do you feel about your relationships with your family?
- Do you feel affirmed and celebrated by your family?
- Will your family be supportive of us?
- If I get stuck in a conversation that makes me feel weird, how do I let you know?
From here, you can make a shared game plan that will help you balance protecting your relationship and getting to know your families. Additionally, make sure you and your partner have space to share thoughts. If they end up saying something like, “Your mom was terrible to me,” you have to be able to sit with that and seek understanding. Really consider each other’s feelings, especially when it's something hard to hear.
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